Full-Length Mirror

I am an aunt. 

I am an aunt to eight nephews.    

I am an aunt to three nieces. 

Not much for sugar and spice and everything nice, my nieces weren’t particularly girly-girls.  Like their brothers, they were more snips and snails and puppy dogs’ tails.  Their dolls lay abandoned as they climbed trees.  Their pink dresses hung neglected in favor of denim blues.  But as they grew up, as they went from pig tails to press outs, a feminine awareness began to emerge. 

They were becoming women.  They were transforming.

As their bodies began to develop, their minds, too, began to change.  They became conscientious of how they carried themselves.  They began to identify style—not just what they wore, but how they wore it.  They still weren’t into floral prints or pastels, but they had begun to appreciate presentation and to notice popular clothing trends, from Polos and plaids to Timberlands and tights. 

But more than an appreciation for labels and fashions, I wanted my nieces to value individuality.  I wanted them to choose pieces that were refined, esthetical, and decent, not just versions of looks that they’d seen on the latest music video.  I wanted them to choose pieces that would be unique to their personalities but wouldn’t compromise their images.    

Noting the way that they were beginning to see themselves, when the girls reached their pre-teens, I introduced them to a must-have for any female closet: the full-length mirror.  “In your mind, you may think that an outfit will look one way,” I coached, “but when you look in the mirror, you may see that it looks very different.”      

Sometimes you need a pop of color.  Red?  Maybe green?

Sometimes you need a necklace.  Pearls or rose gold chain?  18” or 24”?    

Sometimes you need a heel instead of a flat.  Kitten or stiletto?

Like I had learned from my mother and my grandmother, I wanted my nieces to care about how they showed up in the world.  That meant, in part, learning to check their whole look before they walked out of the house.  From head to toe.

Now you’re dressed in a new wardrobe. Every item of your new way of life is custom-made by the Creator, with his label on it. All the old fashions are now obsolete.

Words like Jewish and non-Jewish, religious and irreligious, insider and outsider, uncivilized and uncouth, slave and free, mean nothing. From now on everyone is defined by Christ, everyone is included in Christ.

 So, chosen by God for this new life of love, dress in the wardrobe God picked out for you: compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength, discipline.

 Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you.

And regardless of what else you put on, wear love. It’s your basic, all-purpose garment. Never be without it.

Colossians 3:10-14 The Message

And now, years later, the question that I ask myself is this: “How well is my lifeSTYLE put together?”

When I heard God speaking “Full-Length Mirror,” I was sitting at a traffic light on my way to work.  As the light turned green and I pressed on down the highway, I began to mentally outline this blog.  I assumed that this post would be about women seeing ourselves throughout the totality of the scripture.  You know…

The mirror.  The gospel.

Full-length.  The gospel from Genesis to Revelation.

But now, months later, while that’s true, my perspective has broadened a bit.  Now, I also realize that “Full-Length Mirror” is about us seeing ourselves completely – from top to bottom, from the inside out, from start to finish.  “Full-Length Mirror” is about seeing ourselves dressed for success.   

    God…the Designer.

Jesus…the Pattern.

Holy Spirit…the Tailor.

And the stylist?  The mind.  Yes, the mind.

I’m learning that the way that I think largely determines what I choose to wear as I show up in the world.  Like me, I’m guessing that your walk-in closet is sprinkled with some clothes from the culture too: blazers of bad temper, wedges of wrath, a mock turtleneck of malice, palazzo pants of profanity and a dress or two of dirty talk (reference Colossians 3:8).  We’ve shopped at the same stores, haven’t we?    

Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind…

Romans 12:2 (NIV)

It’s only when we look into the mirror that we see that we need to change.  And as our mindsets change— when anger is no longer a good look for some occasions, when gossip no longer fits, when filthy communication is just no longer us—then the body of Christ develops.  When we clear our closets of carnal attitudes, then we can model Christ-like character as we carry out God’s work in the world. 

So, before we show up for life, let’s start checking our style.  Let’s start looking at ourselves in the mirror…fully.  From head (the way that we think) to toe (the way that we walk).  We might just see that…

Sometimes we need a pop of color…a demonstration of the graciousness of His red blood.   

Sometimes we need a necklace… a string of faithfulness. 

Sometimes we need a heel …a confidence to carry ministry to the world.

So today, this Mother’s Day, I believe that the best way to honor my mother and my grandmother is to not only remember their examples, but to also be that example to the next generation.  Today, my nieces are raising children, climbing corporate ladders and wearing police blues.  A few years ago, I wrote them letters.  In them, I said, “Being a woman is such a special and beautiful thing…Being a lady is elect.  It’s a lovely calling…Look into the mirror (God’s Word) often to see how your outfit is coming together!”   

Sisters, WE ARE visual and virtuous…and victorious.  

Sisters, WE ARE compassionate, kind, humble, strong and disciplined.  That’s what God’s girls are made of.

PRINCIPLE: Surely you heard of him and were taught in him in accordance with the truth that is in Jesus. You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.  Ephesians 4:21-24