Withered and Waiting

I have a confession.

It’s good for the soul, they say…

I can’t swim.

It’s a little uncommon, I know.  But there’s a story behind it. 

My grandparents, on my dad’s side, only had one daughter.  Her name was Betty.  When she was in her late teens, she drowned.  I didn’t know my Aunt Betty.  She was lost to the water many years before I was born.  Nevertheless, as a child, stories of her death daunted me.  Instead of them provoking me to learn how to swim, they made me afraid.  Very afraid.

Not so afraid that I wouldn’t go near, or even in, water.  But afraid enough that I wouldn’t go too far.  I didn’t trust the water to let me back out.  In spite of the fear, though, I went tubing with my best friend’s family in elementary school.  The river wasn’t rushing and it wasn’t deep, but when my inner tube flipped over in the water, I was panicked.  Thankfully, my friend’s dad was close enough to get to me quickly.  I gathered my courage, got back on the tube, and lazily floated on down the river.  But I was still afraid.  And I’ve never gone back.

But as an adult, I was determined to conquer this fear.  I wanted to swim.  I wanted to enjoy the water.  I didn’t want to always have to stay in the shallow end of the pool or at the ocean’s edge.  So, I tried swimming lessons.  But the fear, now grown, still remained. 

So, no, I still can’t swim.

After this there was a feast of the Jews; and Jesus went up to Jerusalem.

Now there is at Jerusalem by the sheep market a pool, which is called in the Hebrew tongue Bethesda, having five porches.

In these lay a great multitude of impotent folk, of blind, halt, withered, waiting for the moving of the water.

For an angel went down at a certain season into the pool, and troubled the water: whosoever then first after the troubling of the water stepped in was made whole of whatsoever disease he had.

And a certain man was there, which had an infirmity thirty and eight years.

When Jesus saw him lie, and knew that he had been now a long time in that case, he saith unto him, Wilt thou be made whole?

The impotent man answered him, Sir, I have no man, when the water is troubled, to put me into the pool: but while I am coming, another steppeth down before me.

Jesus saith unto him, Rise, take up thy bed, and walk.

And immediately the man was made whole, and took up his bed, and walked: and on the same day was the sabbath.

John 5:1-9 KJV

I have a confession.

It’s good for the soul, they say…

I am the man at the pool of Bethesda.

There’s a level of life that I want to enjoy, but I’m paralyzed.  It’s not my body, though; it’s my mind. 

There are some dreams that I have yet to realize, some desires that I have yet to see fulfilled.  The fear of them not coming to pass has, at times, paralyzed me.  At other times, the fear of them being actualized has been just as gripping.  And I’ve been waiting such a long time.

What are you waiting for?

Maybe you have profiles on Christian Mingle and eHarmony.

Maybe you have resumes on LinkedIn and indeed.

Maybe you have tried modern medicine and holistic healing.

Maybe you have considered adoption and IVF.

Maybe you have prayed and fasted.

And you’re still waiting. 

How much longer?

Can you imagine, being so close to the water, being so close to the thing that will make you feel fulfilled, but be unable to get to it?  Can you imagine, coming to this pool every day for 38 years?  Thirteen thousand, eight hundred and seventy days of “Is today finally going to be the day?” 

How did he keep going back day after day?  Why?

The pool had to have been a place of competition.  Who could get in first?  Who had help?  Who was struggling, waiting all alone?  Thirteen thousand, eight hundred and seventy days of “I have to beat everyone else into the pool to get my healing.”

Maybe this man had faith in the power of the water.  Perhaps he believed that one day, someone was going to have mercy on him and help him in.  Or maybe he didn’t believe at all anymore.  Perhaps he was only there that day because it was simply what he’d done the day before…and the day before that…  Maybe he was so used to being withered, so used to waiting, that he no longer had any expectation of wholeness.  Maybe showing up wasn’t hope.  Perhaps it was habit. 

But then one day, at this “house of mercy”, grace, in the person of Jesus, showed up.  And He made the man’s wait worth it. 

I am the man at the pool of Bethesda.  And you, Daughter, are too.

Stay at the pool.  Stay at the pool afraid.  Stay at the pool discouraged.  Stay at the pool tired.  Stay at the pool lonely.  Stay at the pool when everyone else, but you, is getting in.  Stay at the pool.  One day, Jesus is coming through, and when He does, He’ll take us from withered and waiting to whole and walking.

PRINCIPLE:  But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.  Isaiah 40:31